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What's involved?

Most people do not know what to do when a death has occurred. We hope this area of our website will guide you in the right direction. We have provided step-by-step what is involved when planning a funeral. If you have any questions or would prefer to speak to someone directly, please contact us.
​Who to Call First
​Whether you received a 2 a.m. phone call with news of an unexpected death or shared your loved one's final moments of a long illness, your initial reaction to the death was likely shock. It doesn't seem to matter how prepared we are - or aren't - a loved one's death often leaves us feeling numb and bewildered. If you're responsible for making the funeral arrangements or executing the will, shock and grief can be immobilizing. Even simple decisions can be overwhelming.

A Death has Occurred Out of Town
A loss when out of town can be really overwhelming. Calling us first will simplify the process of returning your loved one to our funeral chapel for services and save you hundreds of dollars.
​Making the first phone calls
​What to do first depends on the circumstances of the death. When someone dies in a hospital or similar care facility, the staff will usually take care of some arrangements, such as contacting the funeral home you choose. You will need to notify family, friends and clergy. It may be easier on you to make a few phone calls to other relatives or friends and ask each of them to make a phone call or two to specific people, so the burden of spreading the news isn't all on you. If you are alone, ask someone to keep you company while you make these calls and try to cope with the first hours after the death.
​Call a Funeral Director
​Whatever the circumstances of death, one of your first calls should be to a licensed funeral director. We are here to help you: 
  • Transport the body
  • Obtain a death certificate
  • Select a casket, urn and/or grave marker
  • Arrange the funeral, memorial and/or burial service
  • Prepare the obituary
  • Help you notify the deceased's employer, attorney, and insurance company
  • Offer grief support or direct you to other resources.
Call the Employer
If your loved one was working, you'll need to call his or her employer immediately. Ask about the deceased's benefits and any pay due, including vacation or sick time, disability income, etc. Ask if you or other dependents are still eligible for benefit coverage through the company. Ask whether there is a life insurance policy through the employer, who the beneficiary is and how to file a claim.
Call the Life Insurance Company
Look through the deceased's paperwork for the life policy. Call the agent or the company and ask how to file a claim. Usually the beneficiary (or the beneficiary's guardian, if a minor) must complete the claim forms and related paperwork. You'll need to submit the death certificate and a claimant's statement to establish proof of claim. Remember to ask about payment options. You may have a choice between receiving a lump sum or the having the insurance company place the money in an interest-bearing account from which you can write checks.

MeetiNg With the Funeral director

​As soon as an appointment can be made, you will need to meet with a funeral director to begin the final arrangements. This will be a difficult time for you and your loved ones. The funeral home staff will be there to guide you in making decisions and help make this difficult time a little bit easier.
Who Will Make the Decisions?
Deciding on your loved ones final goodbye will be challenging but not impossible. The funeral home will help you in providing the answers to questions you may have. They will help you understand what is involved in planning a funeral and be there to support you in any way that you need. Something you will need to think about is who will be making the decisions? Will it be you? Will it be someone with you at the funeral home?
Who Else is Involved in the Arrangements?
Does the deceased have children, friends, family that would like to be a part of arranging the funeral? Do you know how the deceased felt about funerals or what their final wishes were? You and your loved ones know the deceased best and your funeral home will work with you to help in celebrating a life lived.
Do you have the information gathered for the paperwork?
When a death occurs, it is a legal matter that requires paperwork. To better prepare yourself for the arrangement at the funeral home, it may be helpful to gather documents needed. Below are a list of documents needed when a death has occured:

  • Account Statements of the deceased
  • Life Insurance Policies
  • Beneficiary Designations
  • Deeds for Real Estate
  • Automobile and Boat Titles
  • Stock & Bond Certificates
  • Pre-nuptial Agreements
  • Post-nuptial Agreements
  • Loans
  • Leases
  • Copies of Bills (utility, cell phone etc.)
  • Last Will and Testament and any Codicils
  • Revocable Living Trust
  • Tax Returns​

Burial or cremation?

The funeral is an important step toward healing, not only for yourself, but for everyone who is affected by the loss of a life.  There are a number of things to consider when putting someone’s final arrangements in place.
​Which type of service will help you and your loved ones heal?
You will need to decide if you want your loved one to be buried or cremated. If you choose to have your loved one buried, you will need to decide if you want to have a viewing and if you want this viewing to be public or private. Arrangements for a cemetery space will need to be made if not already done.

If you choose to have your loved one cremated, please remember that you can still have the body present for viewing before the cremation. Many families do not know this option exists and do not get the needed closure to be on their path to healing. You will then need to decide if you would like the cremated remains buried, scattered or kept in an urn or other keepsake.

Too often, people choose a fast service with little time for remembering a life lived. Having a funeral service with time to say goodbye and proper measures in place to ensure that your loved one is remembered now and in the future  is important, not only for your healing, but for others as well.

Choosing the products

Now that you have thought more about burial or cremation for your loved one, you will need to choose the products such as caskets, cremation containers, personalization pieces and memorialization products. Below is a general idea of what can be available from a funeral home.
​CASKET SELECTIONS
Funeral homes have a number of caskets that you can choose from. Choose from cloth caskets, wood caskets, metal caskets and others. Customize many of the caskets to pay a fitting tribute to your loved one.
CREMATION CONTAINERS
If you have chosen direct cremation, a casket is not required. A cremation container is to hold the body of your loved one as an alternative to the casket.
​VAULT SELECTIONS
Outer Concrete Burial Vaults

Outer burial vaults are used primarily for two specific reasons:

  1. To support the grave, we have all walked in cemeteries, and have found the ground to be very uneven in many areas. The use of a vault eliminates the settling of the grave. Many cemeterians require the use of burial vaults for obvious maintenance reasons.
  2. To protect the casket and remains: For many families this is extremely important and to some families it is not. The choice is yours, although many cemetery's and their maintenance people wish you to have an outer concrete burial vault at the time of disposition, the choice is always yours

Outer burial vaults range from a non-lined outer burial vault and serves as basic protection from the gravesite elements, to Lined outer burial vaults which are designed for families who wish a more permanent protective burial vault. ​​​
​LINED VAULTS
​Lined vaults are designed to protect the deceased and the casket against the entrance of any water or foreign grave elements. Lined vaults are constructed with a combination of concrete cores, steel reinforcement and with inner liner materials ranging from ABS plastic, Polystyrene, Stainless Steel to the maximum lining for the maximum protection available such as a Copper or Bronze lining. All of the above outer burial vaults have a unique tongue and grove design in the lid and the body of the vault. A special sealant is applied before the lid is moved into place. All outer burial vault lids have the deceased's name, year of birth and year of death inscribed on a special plate. The vault companies have the ability to personalize the lid of the vault upon the request of your funeral director.
Urn Selections
When cremation occurs generally the cremated remains are placed in a permanent urn.  The urn may be present for services, used for the final interment or kept in a special place in the home.  Urns are made of numerous materials generally in categories of hardwood, metal or stone. Many families have appreciated the option of personalized engraving.  This may include an inscription of the deceased's name and dates of birth an death.  A wide selection of symbols is also available which may reflect hobbies, interests or affiliations.  

The value of an urn is determined by the material from which is it made and the craftsmanship involved in its production.  A wide range is offered providing choices in all price ranges.
Personalized Options
​
​As you begin to think about personalizing the funeral, turn your thoughts yo tour memories of the person who died. Think about his or her qualities and what he or she means to others. Consider his or her passions, hobbies, pastimes, likes, and dislikes.
You might try making a list of the following:

  • Attributes or passions of the person who died
  • Special memories to share
  • Achievements of the person who died
  • Important people to include somehow​


Personalize the elements of the ceremony
Once you've given thought to the unique life and personality of the person who died, it's time to incorporate those memories into the funeral plan. Be creative as you, together with your family, friends, funeral director and the person who will lead the service, brainstorm how to remember and honor this special person.

A good way to personalize the funeral is to personalize the common elements of funeral ceremonies:


  • The visitation
  • The eulogy
  • The music
  • The readings
  • The procession
  • The committal service
  • The gathering or reception

The service details

Now that you have thought about burial versus cremation, it is time to think about what you would like the service to be like and represent.
The Location of the Service
Is there a special place that your loved one would like to have their final goodbye? There are many options to holding a service for the deceased. It can be held in the funeral chapel, in the community, really the options are endless. This is where you can rely heavily on the funeral director to help create a memorable service.
Pallbearers
Pall Bearers are the people you have probably seen who carry the casket at the service, if there is a casket present. Have you thought about who will hold this responsibility?
Who Will Be Officiating the Service?
You can choose to have a minister officiate the service or a celebrant. The difference between the two are religious and non-religious. Some find it offensive to speak of religion if the deceased did not have religious beliefs. The choice is yours for who you would like to officiate the service.
Other Decisions to Be Made
There are a number of other decisions that will need to be made for the service. You will need to decide which flowers will be used, the type of music to be played, if there will be transportation to and from the service for friends and family, if there will be people speaking of stories or memories of the deceased, if there will be a eulogy, and any other special services that may reflect the life of your loved one.

If you have any questions, please contact us.
        ©2022 Perry-Komdat Funeral Chapel Inc. | 2691 NY Highway 43 | Averill Park, NY 12018 | Phone: (518) 674-3100

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